Why People Read an "About Me"
When you read an "About Me" you want to really know two things:
1: Does this person match with "my style?" Meaning, "do our personalities mesh?"
2: Can this person help me?
The first question: Does this person match with "my style?"
Listen, I live in NYC and grew up in the area. I speak rather bluntly, but at my core I'm kind. I am not a "nice guy," because nice guys tend to be transactional in their relationships, but I always want what's best for the person I'm dealing with.
Yet if you can't take an occasional curse word in general, then this probably isn't going to work.
Beyond that, I fucking love learning (case in point with the cursing). I'm constantly learning and reading things related to coaching or change. Currently, I'm reading two books:
Before You Know It: The Unconscious Reasons We Do What We Do by John Bargh, PhD, and
I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression by Terrence Real
What are you reading? (Anyways, I'm getting off topic)...
The books I've read over the years are a veritable library into the mind of how and why we do the things we do.
I've been obsessed with two questions for at least the past 25+ years:
1: "How and why do people do the things they do?" And…
2: "How do people change?"
This obsession started because growing up with an alcoholic stepfather, and being the oldest, it seemed like I had to constantly be on guard. I experienced a lot of fucked up things and that would've been fine, if I didn't see myself going down the same path as him. This built shame that I became like someone I fucking despised. My late teens, 20's, and early 30's were filled with more mistakes than I'd care to share (but could).
I fEll into the same patterns, where I'd want to change, be good for a bit, and then fuck up, Where I'd start drowning in shame.
It was either that or playing life so small that I wouldn't even allow myself to make a fucking mistake.
Neither was good...yet I consistently searched for answers.
Which leads to the second question: Can this person help me?
Short answer, Yeah, I'm Pretty confident I can help anyone.
Not only do I have the real world experience of overcoming awful bullshit, but have combined that with the consistent learning, Leading me to having the Tools and Techniques to help My client's Lives.
The constant learning has allowed me to take nuggets of wisdom from various sources, and use them even if they only apply to one client, in one particular situation. Knowing how and why the mind works, and helping someone to overcome their own blocks, to step into who they want to be, even if they're not entirely sure they can, is exactly why I'm there.
Therefore, if you're ready, or maybe, possibly considering a change sign-up for a quick call by clicking the button below or emailing me at [email protected] to see if coaching is for you.
Below is a short-list of courses I've studied, besides majoring in Psychology:
- ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy): Focused on Values and Value-Based Actions,
- CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy): How to shift your thinking to what's more logical,
- DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy): Works with being able to Pause and practice different ways of being, knowing that two things can seem contradictory where both can be true at the same time,
- SDT (Self-Determination Theory): The 5 different levels of External and Internal Motivation and how to develop more internal motivation for action,
- Schema Therapy: Deals with Parts, Schemas, and Modes, to
- EET (Emotional Efficacy Therapy): Teaches you how to “Emotionally surf" the full range of an emotion, to
- Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT – different than the one below): Deals with attachments and being able to improve relationships by recognizing the dance of relationships to become more securely attached, to
- Non-Violent Communication (NVC): Deals with the 4 Steps to 1. See a Situation without judgement, 2. Know your Feelings, 3. Linked to your Needs, and r. Make a Positive Action Request, to get to a place where both your and the other person's needs are met.
- Solution Focused Brief Therapy: Deals with the "Magic Question," and how that has the ability to focus on what you want and what works, as opposed to what doesn't work.
- Narrative Therapy: How the Stories you tell yourself impact how you feel about a situation and being able to change them.
I've worked with and got Coaching certificates:
- IFS (Internal Family Systems) Coaching: Deals with Parts work and the multiplicity of our inner world. How to allow for all the parts to be present and to be heard,
- Lefkoe Belief System (Similar, but a bit deeper than CBT above).
- Gottman Method Couples Therapy: Both Level 1 and 2 certifications
- Currently working on Treating Affairs and Trauma through the Gottman Institute.
Beyond that, I worked and gained knowledge on a wide number of theories and practices ranging from:
- Breathwork
- EFT tapping
- Somatic work
- Core Transformation
- NLP
- Integrative Hypnosis Practices
These are the "non-standard" practices that are sometimes "looked down upon" by the establishment, despite the fact that there's a ton of research showing how effective these things can be.
These are listed because I want you to know there is a breadth and depth of knowledge built from both education, but also real world experience both with myself and my clients.
The point is, I believe I can help you.
The question is, are you willing to give it a shot?
So no matter what you're going through or want to work on, no matter where you're starting from, or where you want to go, from working with feelings of anxiety, of feeling out of control, of wanting to improve your confidence, work on your communication, your health, your mental health, your relationships and ability to maintain them, feelings of overwhelm, or need extra accountability while striving for a particular goal, I'm confident I can help you on your journey.
Are you ready to make the changes to be the person you want to be? If so, contact me.
Wishing you Strength, Peace, Excitement, Love, Growth, and a Life You Appreciate,
J. Damien
Contact
Have any questions? Feel free to email or text using the information provided below.
Note: If you purchase any coaching package, you have 15-days to ask for a full refund. If it's not working for you, or if you think I'm not helping you in the way you want, you can get your money back.
(917) 409-8094
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For More Information, Click on the Free Resources Below:
Small Variable Theory of Change Video
People often think change has to be large.
The truth is being aware of your small variables and then learning to have "discipline" in just a few small moments per day can lead to large changes.
By understanding those "Inflection Points" throughout the day, and making the smallest of different choices there, can have large consequences for your life and lead you to a vastly different destination.
Check out the YouTube video and channel for more information.
Free Intro and Chapter 1
Break Free From the Prison of Your Past: Understand Your Ego’s Stories and Survival Strategies to Reconnect with Who You Authentically Are
People strive to change in one of two main ways:
1. By changing how you feel about what's happened to you.
2: By stepping into who you ultimately want to be.
👉 This book is about Breaking free from your past, by understanding that we have different parts of us, that need to be understood (your Stories), and how to change your automatic reactions (your Survival Strategies).
Click on the picture, or here to get the Intro and chapter 1, for Free!
Free 15-30 Minute Coaching Consultation Call
Not sure if I'm the right coach for you? Schedule a call and let's talk in person.
This can be a regular phone call or, preferred, a Zoom call to see if I can help you and wha tyou're specifically looking to change.
Let me answer all your questions before starting any coaching.
Email me at [email protected]
or Text Me at (917) 409-8094.